I am a Congolese citizen, and a world blogizen, I am 27 years old in 2009, and I have been blogging on the Congo and the world since 2005. I am US-educated with a degree in Political Sciences, and I love languages (I speak 5). Other than that, there is a blog post I once wrote to outline all the things I stand for and believe, so I will reprint it here:
- I believe in one, almighty, merciful God, and I believe in Jesus-Christ as his son, and as Lord and savior. I often state (half-jokingly) that I believe in God because no-one was able to prove to me that he does not exist.
- I believe in love in all its forms (platonic, romantic, filial, agape), AND in the pervasiveness of hate.
- There was a time, after the Rwandan genocide which I partly lived through, when I lost ALL faith in humanity. I have regained part of it since.
- I DO NOT believe in a completely literal interpretation of the Bible.
- I DO NOT prejudge of the divine inspiration and/or the validity of other religions, because I think it is arrogant to claim to understand the extent of the reach of God. As far as I am concerned, most religions on this earth share the same core principles, and are therefore likely to be inspired by God, so I choose to celebrate that which unites us. Call him/her Allah, Shiva, Vishnu, or the Godess, I see them all as different facets of the same God I revere.
- I strongly believe in, and will always defend and protect the right for people not to believe in God, for belief should always be a choice made in full free-will, not under duress, or under pressure.
- I believe that a democratic, tempered, secular and accountable state, with a social market economy, is SO FAR the best government ever devised by mankind.
- I believe in profound respect and reverence for, and reasonable obedience to ones’ parents, but NOT in total submission to them.
- I believe in respect for, and reasonable deference to ones’ elders, but NOT in blind submission to them.
- I believe polygamy, though sometimes apparently viable, is essentially flawed, as I do not believe one can commit their heart, soul, body and life to more than one person at a time, without some form of destructiveness ensuing. Additionally, I believe polygamy infringes on the integrity, the value and the essence of women. Definitely not an option for me.
- I believe men and women are not equal in the sense of identical, because you cannot equate different entities. That does not mean I believe one is superior to the other. In fact I strongly believe that they are – at birth, in their essence, and by their common humanity – equal in rights, freedoms and liberties, and they should be equal before the law, and equal in receiving opportunities to become the best they can be, in the activity of their choosing.
- I believe that no human being should be barred from doing any activity of their choice because of their gender, because at the core of our essence we are all human.
- In a heterosexual couple, I do moderately subscribe to the traditional social gender roles, with the father’s essential (but not only) function as the provider, and the mother’s essential (but not only) function as the nurturer. I am African after all. But ultimately I believe in communication in a couple, so each couple ends up determining what works for them.
- I have absolutely NO ISSUE with pre-marital sex between consenting adults (“consenting”, and “adults” being the key words here). I however also believe that less is smarter, that discernment and cautiousness are better than bountifulness and a care-free attitude, and that the safer and wiser way to enjoy one’s sexuality is within a meaningful relationship. I do not expect people – or myself – to always be wise… so please use a condom for crying out loud!!!!.
- At the same time, I am very demanding about faithfulness in marriage. No one forces you to take those vows, so when you do, stick to them, for Christ-sake. Or if you can’t be faithful, then be honest with your partner and separate as friends, rather than poisoning and destroying each other’s lives.
- I do not understand the point of open-marriages, open-relationships. Either you are married or you are not, and either is fine with me. If sex with multiple partners is what you want, then fine, we are all adults. You have people that you have sex with, who also happen to be friends of yours, and that is okay with me. But in that case, stop pretending that you are in a marriage, or in a relationship.
- I believe in prevention of AIDS and other STDs through age-appropriate, comprehensive sexual education (that includes abstinence as the better option), and widespread condom distribution and USAGE TRAINING.
- I believe that there is too much posturing and hypocrisy running around about prostitution, pornography, exotic dancers and sexual self-gratification. Many people who condemn them, are the same people who indulge in them in the most perverse ways. I believe, like in all things, moderation should be the key. Since it has been around forever, and it is not going anywhere, prostitution should be legalized, and regulated in order to ensure it is done safely, with both parties being protected. For the rest, adult humans should be free to watch whatever they choose, and do whatever they want with their body.
- As far as I know, women are the way for me. Nevertheless, I have absolutely NO ISSUE with gays and lesbians, and I support them in their fight for equality. When I was in my times of tribulations, it was often gay people who were there to support me. Not the self-righteous heterosexual Christians from my church who suddenly wanted nothing to do with me, but a Lesbian couple that actually took care of me. That was eye-opening for me. Love and affection and attraction are just as strong whether you are gay or straight.
- That said, I believe marriage, at its inception, was conceived as an institution built with the strict purpose to sanctify, establish in the community, and legally and religiously protect the commitment between the members of a heterosexual family unit and natural procreation.
- Now, by the same token, I also believe that our societies are perfectible. As the general definition of what constitutes a loving couple, or a loving family, has evolved, and continues to evolve, I do not see an issue, as far as the state is concerned, with – and in fact I support – granting the same rights and guarantees contained in a legal marriage to same-sex couples, and the children they may raise (for those of you in the US, I mean “civil unions with full marriage rights”). I have friends who were raised by same-sex couples, and they are often better adjusted to life than I am. Ultimately, I believe it is counter-productive to get hung-up on a word.
- I also believe that no pastor, priest, rabbi or imam should ever be required to preside over any religious marriage ceremony that he/she believes is against the core beliefs of the religion he belongs to. In fact I believe that religious officials should not be auxiliaries of the state in matters of marriage. Religious marriages, and civil marriages/unions should be separate affairs, with the second one being the only one legally-binding for ALL (heterosexual or homosexual). If you want your union sanctified in church then that’s your choice. I know I do.
- I support a woman’s right to choose whether or not to keep a baby during the first trimester of the pregnancy. That said, I hate abortions! For Christ-sake take the pill, use a sterilet, use a diaphragm, use a condom, use a cream, use whatever, but damn!
- I believe a woman should inform the baby’s father of her intention to have an abortion, unless that may result in bodily harm for her. I believe the father should have the right to try to talk her out of it. But I believe that only the pregnant woman should have the final say, regardless of what others say.
- I believe women should be fully informed of the potential emotional and/or physical consequences of abortions, including potential sterilty, and post-partem depression, etc.
- I believe all humans are created equal, born equal, and eternally equal in their essence, within their common humanity. For that reason I find racism literally nonsensical and abhorent. We all bleed red. I have nothing but contempt, maybe compassionate pity, and absolutely no patience for anyone who would argue the superiority of one “race” over the others. I have even less patience for anyone using these “phenotypical” differences to justify further divisions and violence amongst humans.
- If you find someone of your own country that you love and you want to marry, then please do so. If you find someone of your “race” to live with for the rest of your life, then by all means do so. But if you find love elsewhere, if you find your life-partner across the globe, with a different hue, a different culture, a different background, and you are aware of that, and you feel up to the challenge for your love, then BY ALL MEANS MARRY, PLEASE go for it.
- The next time I hear someone in my family tell me how they have issues with mixed kids, and they don’t want them in the family, calling them lost souls, or “chauve-souris”, I think I will raise hell. And then I will only have one answer: Barack Obama.
- I am a citizen of the world, and as much as I am allowed, I treat whichever corner of this universe I am allowed to live in as home.
- I am a Pan-Africanist, and I believe in the promise of Africa. I believe in evolution, and the theory of the recent African origin of mankind, so I really see my Afrika as the motherland of mankind, and as such I know its future is promising.
- I love my country, Congo, a bit more than other countries, and although I do not necessarily think that love is rational (what love ever is), I do not think it is wrong. Your country is like your extended family, or your extended house, or your extended village. I love my dear Congo, and I believe it is potentially one of the greatest countries in the world. I shed tears of agony for its current situation, and those of my fellow countrymen and women dying there needlessly every day in a war waged for interests that are beyond their grasp.
Now, that is where I stand. I love people, I love my friends and my family, even when they do not repay me in kind. I am a people person, and I am also secretly very shy. I am an imperfect human, I am overweight, and I have no illusions about me, my importance to others, or my physical appearance. What I do know is that I was granted only four or five gifts by God (or providence for all you atheists) and I cherish them dearly: I have loving parents, I can sing decently well, I have a way with languages, I care and love absolutely, and I have a halfway decent mind behind my tiny eyes. My one stand, the one thing I concede to no one, it is the right for me to form these and other opinions and beliefs, and the right for me to defend them freely when challenged, without having to endure recriminations. If you disagree with me, tell me, and we will talk about it. Challenge me, and I will welcome the challenge with a hug and a smile. But I am tired of bowing down to social and cultural taboos, and to bitter people in search of vindication through putting down all those that do not fit their understanding of what’s right. So for love’s sake DO NOT attempt to tamp me down with your superior arrogance, your contemptuous condescension, or your pity, for I will no longer take it lying down.
